Ok so why is it that only late at night the bug to write hits? Maybe its because I am alone in bed, something I hate and it forces me to think. Think about the men that I tend to fall in love with, the men that I find so appealing yet so hard to hold on to.
I dont know why I fall in love with men out of my reach but I do. There's something about the masculine man that holds my heart in a vice. Yet every man I display my heart to seems to look at it....notice it...maybe pet it, indulge it for just a moment..a moment of sheer ecstasy, an orgiastic split second where the walls drop and I let go. I give to the feeling completely only to snap to and see him gone, a small trail of what my love could have been leading away from me.
You wonder why Im bitter? Why should anyone be out of anyone elses' reach? Why should anyone have to feel that they are not worthy of what they might find "loveable". Screw social tiers and houses. So what if Im a bear and your a straight man, it doesn't make my love any less real.
FK this Im going to bed, looks like its me and my pillow yet again.
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